Weather Between Us – open-weather

2024-06-07 13:41:29

Sasha Engelmann

Hackney Downs, London,

The sun was rising when I rode my bike through Hackney Downs this morning, coming back home from a club in Dalston. My limbs felt both heavy and light in the very pleasing way that limbs feel when you have been dancing for hours. People were already in the park, or maybe they had been there the whole night. I could see the faint spark of a cigarette in a huddle of bodies between the hedges. I thought about getting my radio antenna and catching a pass at dawn, but sleep was too tempting. Later, at almost 2pm, I re-emerged from my flat and went back to the park. In contrast to the soft, orange-pink glow of the early morning, the early afternoon was warm, hot and dry. As I started the pass, a man in a group of men that normally always stand around a bench at the north-east corner of the park, around thirty-forty metres away from me, yelled "Is that for free internet?!". I could only think to yell back, "No!". As I couldn't explain at such distance, I used my free arm to point to the northern horizon and traced an arc through the sky from North to South. That seemed to help. He yelled again "What are you tracking!!?" and I replied "A satellite!! An image!!". As no members of the group looked like they were going to come any nearer, I walked over to them after the pass was done, and showed them the live-decoded image. They huddled around my computer. I wondered what they might say about the weather, given that the five to six of them are always here at this bench, all day, every day, rain or shine. Instead, they asked me what the weather was going to be like. I said I was not a meteorologist, but the image was showing different patterns of clouds over the Atlantic, maybe coming to the UK. They seemed to like this. One of them said 'nice one mate' and shook my hand in the way men do when they put out their arms, bent at the elbow, with the hand close to the chest. When you close hands you end up getting pulled together in a show of comraderie.

2023-12-22 09:53:21

clear skies after a storm, solstice sun, strong warm wind, wet wood of the balcony

2023-12-23 21:14:06

Mild, very windy, raining

2023-12-24 09:29:15

windy, mild, a small amount of blue sky, it's Christmas eve!

2023-12-25 09:20:08

Grey and so warm. It's Christmas (and my birthday). The horrors being reported from Gaza seem to be worsening: Heavy weather, lethal weather. Clouds maps are always moving. Clouds make visible our shared breath.

2023-12-26 18:10:44

2024-01-05 20:16:07

Chilly and noisy (cars, mopeds, buses)

2024-01-06 20:00:00

Cold. It's been raining all day. I held my antenna out of the window.

2024-01-07 08:21:24

White-grey sky. Not too cold. It began to snow just before the satellite pass, so I had to change plans and stay on my balcony, where my laptop could stay dry, instead of going to the park. I used a stretchy piece of plastic to weatherise my dongle.

2024-01-13 18:50:29

Cold but clear. I enjoyed being in the weather because I have a new coat and I have been inside all day. Amazingly, the snow on the balcony is the same as when I left a week ago. I take pleasure in this stability because I am feeling disorientated: I did not sleep on the night train and I stayed in bed all today.

2024-01-14 20:03:14

I wore too many wooly layers! It was milder than I expected, around zero Celsius. My ground station was between the bins and the Austrian Post Academie. A few stars were visible between the clouds and light pollution. People hurried past: a dog walker, a parent and child, a runner. I have felt restless today. I asked Nicola about the weather: he says people are ice skating on the nearby pond in Türkenschanzpark.

2024-01-15 21:29:44

Cold, dark, damp. I feel "under the weather". Today, I stayed home and experimented with the loop antenna. To adapt the antenna to receive Very High Frequency transmissions, I squashed it into folded dipole. Despite what the online instructions recommended, this seemed to make things worse. I reverted to the open loop – the circumference of which is just under a half wavelength of 137 MHz. It okay but was highly directional. I will try again soon.

2024-01-16 11:29:29

Augarten, Wien, Austria

A piercingly clear day. Fresh. Chilly! I was glad to feel the sun on my face.

2024-01-17 09:39:48

The balcony of my flat, Wien, Austria

Cold, small, icy snow flakes. I had to keep my laptop inside. I used the loop antenna, elevated by a curtain pole to 1.5 metres. The antenna was highly directional, and so was challenging to keep tuned to the satellite. There is still pockets of snow on the rooftops. It feels around –3C outside. It wasn't forecast to snow today but the clouds are a pale white-grey and city has the deadened acoustic quality of a snow day. The light level is low.

2024-01-18 08:13:21

The balcony of my flat, Wien, Austria

So icy underfoot! My body felt sluggish this morning from a lack of sunlight and and my period. I ventured outside only to grip the v-dipole antenna to the balcony railing and then stayed inside for the duration of the satellite pass.

2024-01-18 09:26:57

The balcony of my flat, Wien, Austria

I tried the loop antenna again, this time squashing it into a folded dipole. The result was not good. Despite the near overhead position of the satellite, I could barely hear its transmission. I experimented with orientating the antenna vertically and horizontally. The temperature feels a warm 2–5 degrees this morning. It is raining lightly. Over WhatsApp, my brother sent a photo of the sun rise off the coast of Cornwall. In return, my mum shared a photo of her frosty garden. In both photos, the sky was clear. Yet an hour later my sister’s partner sent a video of large snow flakes falling in Truro. The weather in the UK is so much more changeable than in Austria. Here we have steady, continental weather. British weather is sea weather.

2024-01-20 20:32:35

Inside my bedroom! Wien, Austria

It's clear but cold. I'm still feeling unwell (again!) that I think it feels colder to me than it actually is. I stayed inside during the satellite pass.

2024-01-21 20:19:49

The balcony of my flat, Wien, Austria

Frosty, slowly defrosting. This morning, I woke to a blackbird singing. There is still snow on the ground in the woods. Sasha and I have been receiving NOAA satellite imagery everyday for one month!

2024-01-22 20:08:39

Leaning out of the Northeast facing window of my flat, Wien, Austria

I have been inside most of today. The weather inside is stuffy.

2024-01-23 21:33:09

On the North West corner of Diepold Park, Wien, Austria

I think heard a Great Tit calling this morning. It rained today and feels milder. I was meant to be on a night train to the Netherlands this evening but German train drivers have walked out. They will be on strike until Monday. I have cancelled my trip. Life feels turbulent at the moment.

2024-01-24 19:06:51

Augarten, Wiem, Austria

It almost feel warm today. In the afternoon, it rained but I was inside the studio so didn't notice until I saw the wet pavement. My body also feel springy-ier, the migraine and stiffness I've had since Saturday is receding.

2024-01-25 21:31:00

My bedroom, Wien, Austria

Silent migraine.

2024-01-26 19:06:51

Augarten, near the gun towers, Wien, Austria

Today, the bird song was louder than the beep-beep of the satellite. Gardeners in the park were clearing the dead leaves into piles. I heard that it's better to leave them to decompose and return their nutrients to the trees from which they fell – they don't kill the grass. The temperature is mild and there is no wind, but there is a heavy blanket of cloud. Although it is nearly midday, the cars have their headlights on. This evening I willl go to the 'Defend democracy' protest outside the Austria Parliment.

2024-01-27 22:26:10

On my balcony, freezing my ass off, Austria

Cold, but only because I didn't expect to stand outside, so I didn't have my coat, hat and gloves on. More bird song today. I was around 7 Centigrade. Clear, clear skies. So many stars.

2024-01-28 20:35:07

Inside with the antenna strapped to a curtain rail, tied to my balcony in Wien, Austria

Beautifully sunny. The woods are free of snow and ice, and full of walkers. I went on a solo hike in the Wienerwald, stopping for lunch at Toiflhütte, and breathing plenty of Waldluft. The birds continue to sing. I heard blackbirds, crows, wood peckers, a jay, and small song birds. The temperature is a frosty 5 degrees centigrade, with no wind.

2024-01-29 20:20:46

Entrance of Augarden, Wien, Austria

It's clear and cold again, when I left for work this morning the rooftops were frosted white. Frost always takes me back to childhood. When there was a heavy or hoarfrost, I would go out before school to slide down the field opposite our house on a tray. Sledging on frost felt more risky, edgy, than on snow – the frozen ground could easily inflict bruises. It was also a sport no one else seemed interested in, so I had the field to myself – bold and alone.

2024-01-30 21:46:34

Dornerplatz, Wien, Austria

I worked from home so didn't leave my flat until the evening. Today was dry, clear and cold, but not too cold – you could take your gloves off without your fingers hurting. The stars were bright.

2024-01-31 11:45:19

Gefechtsturm Augarten, Wien, Austria

Open skies and bird song – almost spring like. I did not weather my thermal leggings under my trousers today! At first I thought that I'd made a mistake but quickly I warmed up and enjoyed the free feeling of air on my legs.

2024-02-01 11:30:57

Beside the round flowerbed in Augarten, Wien, Austria

Wet! I have just come back inside from the satellite pass, dripping. I stood in Augarten park, in the intensifying rain, my laptop inside a small bin bag tent. From the warmth of my shared studio, I decoded the image. A huge white arc of water sweeps across my screen from North from Spain to Norway. Is this what it feels like to be at sea – to orientate by waves of water and light? Sometimes Sasha and I joke that open-weather is a queer, feminist space agency. Right now, I feel less like an astronaut and more like an aquanaut.

2024-02-04 19:08:31

In a field by the motorway, somewhere outside Klagenfurt, Austria

Today I swam in an alpine pool next to melting ice. I am recieving this image a dark hill, by a motorway, under the stars.

2024-02-05 20:36:24

At home, on the window ledge., Austria

Turbulence: outside, between me and my partner, in my body. I saw on a forecast map that the jet stream is between me and Sasha. The winds leaving London appear to arrive in Vienna. I like this thought, that we are asynchronously sharing the same air. I imagine messages, aeroplankton (Luftplankton), and water vapour moving between us.

2024-02-06 10:32:11

Children's play area in Diepoldpark, Wien, Austria

Blustery, blue and spring-like. The wind was so string this morning, it almost blew me off my bike.

2024-02-07 21:47:26

On my balcony, Wien, Austria

I was buffeted by mild but squally weather through the satellite pass. When I looked behind me the sky was ominously dark. For a moment, I thought that I should put down my antenna in case an electrical storm was coming, but none was forecast so I kept recording. It has been a tough day and I am feeling tired.

2024-03-15 09:32:12

Augarten, Wien, Austria

This is the first weather note I write in almost a month. The pansies have been planted out in Augarten. I rested my bike on the stone of circular flowerbed and used a mobile phone and my v-dipole antenna to receive a long image. I took with me a cooked painted egg, which I dropped in the gravel when peeling and had to throw away. It is a clear, sunny day.

2024-03-18 10:30:30

Augarten, Wien, Austria

I enter the radio frequency incorrectly and only discover half way through the satellite pass. My bike is leant against a Yew bush. The park is full of children and adult carers, sat on benches in the sun. In my usual spot there was an older woman talking animately to herself, I decide not to risk interupting her. The temperature has dropped, but the sky remains clear. I will call Sasha to discuss this project.

2024-02-13 10:44:38

On my balcony, Wien, Austria

QFH antenna test.

2024-02-22 22:05:16

Reaching out of the door, Wien, Austria

2024-02-29 18:41:05

Augarten, Austria

2024-03-01 22:06:11

At home, Wien, Austria

2024-03-03 20:39:23

Diepoldpark, Wien, Austria

2024-03-04 21:28:15

At home, Wien, Austria

2024-03-05 11:27:55

On the balcony, Wien, Austria

2024-03-06 19:34:04

At home, Wien, Austria

2024-03-07 10:59:59

Augarten by the trees, Wien, Austria

2024-03-14 11:15:08

Augarten by the flowers, Wien, Austria

I did not press 'stop recording' before closing SDR++, and so corrupted the file.

2024-03-15 09:32:12

Augarten, Wien, Austria

This is the first weather note I write in almost a month. The pansies have been planted out in Augarten. I rested my bike on the stone of a circular flowerbed and used a mobile phone and my v-dipole antenna to receive a long image. I take with me a painted cooked egg, which I drop in the gravel when peeling and have to throw away. It is a clear, sunny day.

2024-03-16 18:33:56

Diepoldplatz, Wien, Austria

Experimental copper tube v-dipole antenna.

2024-03-19 21:44:25

Leaning out of the window, Wien, Austria

I catch the last satellite pass of the day, dog tired. I am still waiting for a medical intervention to relive me of the pain that comes in night, preventing me from sleeping soundly. It is cold but clear out. I have given into the warmth of my flat and am leaing out of out the window. This morning on my way to the studio, I a man cycles past me carrying a full-sized bow and arrow.

2024-03-20 18:26:26

Augarten, Wien, Austria

It's so peaceful in the park. The air is rich and still. Dusk has always been my favourite time of day. I need this moment of stillness after working on a project about the war in Gaza. I feel a familiar combination of profound gratitude and guilt. The sky is clear, it helps me.

2024-03-21 11:26:48

Flowerbed, Augarten, Wien, Austria

My phone says that it's 3C but it feels warm in the heat of the sun. I take off my coat and sit on the edge of the stone flowerbed, taking in the bulbs that have sprouted, listening to the satellite's signal, and offering a polite smile to the people who stare as they walk past. I mostly get blank looks, but one older man returns a scowl. It is not just the rise in temperature that makes it feel like spring is here, the air is scented.

2024-03-22 19:38:12

Leaning out of the window at home, Wien, Austria

2024-03-25 22:09:44

Diepoldpark, Wien, Austria

It is still but cold. I receive the image in our local park, standing by the toilets. Earlier in the day, on the train platform in Brno, I see a man dressed like a cattle herder, in full leathers, carrying tall boots. At the vegetable market, I buy a woven fruit basket from aother burly man who shows me and N a photo of him dressed as Obelix the Gaul. Tomorrow is meant to be sunny.

2024-03-27 21:42:54

Malzgasse bus stop, Wien, Austria

"And this is how it sees storms!" I write to Michaela, sharing a vividly coloured enhancement of the satellite image that we had received earlier, standing at the bus stop outside our shared studio space. "That’s just another name for us", she replies with the wit of the screenwriter she is. I like this thought – that we are storms. Robert, standing next to me, looking at my laptop screen, points out the Gaza Strip. I dismissed his observation because the the section of image beneath the map overlay appears to be only noise. Later, when I turned off the map overlay, to my surpsie Gaza's coastline was still visible – noisy but indisputably present in the image. How many times has Gaza been visible, only for me to not see it? I have spent the day working remotely with colleagues in London on digital platform for investigations into Gaza War. And now, somehow, without realising, from my local bus stop I have formed an indirect yet unbroken line-of-sight with the Palestinian territory.

2024-03-28 20:06:43

Standing outside my flat, in the rain, Austria

I rush home from the tram in the wind and rain, hoping to leave my things inside before the satellite arrives. I don't make it so stand buffeted by the wind on a street corner. Cars pass me, headlights on. Despite the tall apartment buildings, I catch a strong signal and am feeling happy until, for reasons I don't understand (perhaps the wet) my phone crashes, ending the recording. The experience does not help my sense of being off kilter or out of sync.

2024-03-29 11:28:18

Usual spot, Augarten, Austria

It feels like the first day of spring, again. It is windy but sunny, warm and dry. I sit on the stone flowerbed in the park and receive a long image with the satellite just under 70 degrees to my West. Stupidly, knowing that we had to get up early this morning to view two flats, I worked late last night and then doom scrolled the Internet. Now, I am tried and annoyed with myself. I have been feeling unsettle for multiple days now, I hope this feeling passes. This afternoon I must focus on writing an essay for open-weather. I think that I will write about how NOAA-15, NOAA-18 and OAA-19 may be decommissioned as soon as September 2025. It is less the "ending", more the not knowing when it will happen that is a concern for the project.

2024-03-30 11:17:58

Diepoldpark, Wien, Austria

Why is it that I am so low energy? The sunlight that has made it through the dense semicircle-shaped cloud over Vienna is dim and omnidirectional. It's warm and humid. I woke early and could not fall back asleep. I had hoped to begin the day clear headed, ready to write. Yesterday, after uploading my satellite recording to this archive, I noticed a large plume of Saharan Dust over the Mediterranean. I wrote to Sasha who relied saying that she had not spotted the cloud in her imagery had observed a "light sprinkling" of a reddish dust on the snow. We share an interest in the ways satellite imagery is, “drawn to the dust, the particulate, which it has itself apparently become.” (Leslie, 2021: 102). I want to get better at reading particles, not just pixels.

2024-03-31 12:04:22

Asperleiten (favourite place), Wienerwald, Austria

We went seeking satellites and Saharan Dust. Last night, I discovered the chrome mudguards of my bicycle patterned with rust coloured droplets. N said that they look like small galaxies. Now we are walking to my favourite tree-lined field in the Wienerwald (Vienna Woods). The light levels have increased, but even when the sun is out there is a thick haze. On reaching the field, I slip on a golden vest, clip belt and tool pouch. The beautifully gender neutralising astronaut-athleisure 'look' is intended to disrupt the documentary style photos we are about to take. Stood in the centre of the field among tubular Cowslip flowers, I scan the Northern horizon with the antenna while N snaps away on my iPhone. I almost forget to adjust the antenna's Gain. When I do, NOAA-18 appears. We spend the next 10 minutes enacting a satellite hunt, much to the confusion of a couple who walk past twice with two yapping lap dogs. The results of the very real satellite hunt photoshoot are great. To have spotted the iron and mineral-rich Dust cloud in imagery two days ago, and to now be immersed in it, to be experiencing it as 'weather', is uncanny. The walk to the bus home is longer and sweatier than I expected. A warm wind is being drawn North, and presumably with it the dust – a billion small crystalline galaxies.

2024-04-01 19:19:06

Ferienhaus Post Sozial, Wien, Austria

A cold wind cuts through my flimsy Uniqlo jacket, making me shiver during the satellite pass. Only three hours earlier, I'd been sat on our balcony in shorts and a cut-off tee-shirt, reading Lucy Sabin and Jorge Olcina Cantos' article 'Weathering Saharan dust beyond the Spanish Mediterranean Basin: An interdisciplinary dialogue'. In it, they paraphrase Michael Marder writing that "to face dust is to face not the Other, but the self" (Marder, 2016: 6) Taken out of context, for me, there is something liberating in the idea that we can change state, transmutate, to the extent that we are unrecognisablle, even to ourselves. Back in inside the flat, a change in the soundscape of the street alerts to the rain. Perhaps a interin "cold drop" or the end of the dust weather. N and I take the opportunity to return to the balcony in raincoats and, under the cover of darkness, throw fists fulls of flower seeds into the empty lot next door. Last year, when the old building that had to occupied the lot was being torn down, angry, I had bought online two litres of wildflower seeds. Now we were completing the plan. The seeds rained down, hopefully accomopanied by nutrient rich Saharan Dust.

2024-04-02 09:10:37

Dornerplatz, Wien, Austria

It rained all night. Not "blood rain" coloured by Saharn Dust, normal rain. I sat on a bench in Dornerplatz and received the satellite image in the sun and wind. The sky is a true blue this morning. Seeing it made me realise how grey and brown it has been the last couple of days. It's amazing how quickly one can forget the colour of the sky, and then be shocked by its rediscovery. In The Memory Police by Japanese author Yōko Ogawa, a community living under a phantasmagorical authoritian leader slowly forget the existance of mundane things: hat, ribbon, bird, rose. These things disappear in the night. Once they are gone they no longer have meaning. In the community, forgetting is policed and takes three stages (1) the erasure of the thing (2) the erasure of the memory of the thing (3) the erasure of the memory of the memory of the thing. The news this morning is all about the war in Ukraine and the war in Palestine, and how Israel had killed Iranian Military Commanders in Syria. Iran has sworn to take punitive action against the United States. [Interval] Three people close to me messaged today to say that someone they knew had died. I have sent my condolences, even thought this never feels enough. Today, has grown into a day marked by learning of the passing of people who I will never know. I am writing this down as a minor act of recognition and remembrance.

2024-04-03 08:43:01

Rossauer Brücke, Wien, Austria

It is beautifully clear and sunny. I woke early feeling rested after a good swim in the Stadthallenbad last night, which surely helped rid my body of stress hormones. This morning, I stopped on a bridge on the way into the studio to receive an image from NOAA-15. I've noticed that its imagery appears degraded, less detailed, compared to the other two satellites. At this time of day, the sunlight bounces off the Mediterranean, Aegean and Black Seas creating a white flare around the the coastline of Crete and other Greek islands. No Saharan Dust was visible in the image, just two large anticyclonic clouds.

2024-04-11 10:04:37

Resting on the grass, Augarten, Wien, Austria

Israel-Palestine, Gulf of Suez, Cairo. Each image yeilds a different combination of landforms, coastlines, rivers and seas by which to orientate by. In land, light and dark patches index dry steppes and deserts, river basins thick with vegetation and cities. I did not capture an image yesterday because I was feeling worn down. In the morning, I had another emergency appointment to diagnose my chronic pain. To express my anger and dispair, I wrote a poem. I am submitting this word-image in place of yesterday's image: 'Try this' It's not an emergency the doctor concluded. / I become so submissive during medical appointments, it was / only when I left the hospital, and / lost another night's sleep to pain, that / I felt like crying and shouting. / Try living with this pain? / Try working after lying awake for multiple nights because / you cannot sleep because / the pain is gnawing at your insides. / Try living with this pain / for more than five years and being told by medical professionals (who you naively assumed would help) / that it is stress, / indigestion, / "your body is changing as you age", / "I have reassured Ms Dyer that the pain is nothing to worry about." / Try living with this pain and repeating those claims. / Screw your lack of emergency. / The discharge note I was sent home with yesterday said I had / blood in my "Douglas Pouch" and advised an operation / using a "DiVinci robot". / How fitting that my body part is named after a man / and the machine that will be used to to probe, cut, mince, remove the my offending flesh is named after a 'male genius'. / Try weathering this climate of sexism. / Try weathering a climate of sexism / in which women's health issues such as endometriosis are still so poorly researched and understood. / Try living with this pain, / then tell me that this not an emergency.

2024-04-15 22:08:13

Hanging out of my window, Wien, Austria

A sunny morning was followed by heavy rain in the late afternoon. At one point, I opened the window facing onto the street and smelled cut grass, which is strange as there are no parks nearby. Before leaving the flat to attend a fundraising meeting, I check the weather radar on my phone and see two large bands of rain almost upon Vienna. Geopolitics is even stormy today. Israel is threatening retaliation against Iran, and stories of dissidents being silenced in Russia and Belarus are in the news. Meanwhile, here, Austria is keeling over to the right. Today, I also learned that abortion is still illegal in Germany.

2024-04-16 12:08:18

Local park, Wien, Austria

Can relief be an atmosphere? If so, it is enveloping me. I finally managed to speak to someone who would about my health insurance problem. I think that an end could be insight. It is dry but the clouds are low and the temperature has dropped significantly, again. These days I am alternating between shorts and tee shirts and a heavy winter coat.

2024-04-22 22:21:27

Hanging out of my window, Wien, Austria

Clear skies, still cold. I am tired yet relaxed. It is a long day. In the afternoon and evening I helped to remotely interview applicants for the design school where I teach. Every 15 minutes a student joined the call from a different location: Moscow, Guangzhou, a city I can't recall in Canada, then maybe Barcelona, Offenbach in Germany, a few streets away from me in Vienna, the list went on. Our questions were a variation of: why this course now? The answers overlapped, but the reasons for studying and urgencies were diverse, so too were the concerns about visas, queerness or work after graduation. About half of the candidates expressed a desire to develop a personal creative practice while the others leant toward collaborative or collective work. It is exciting to hear so many desires in one day.

2024-04-23 20:52:44

Lorenz-Bayer-Park, Wien, Austria

The software defined radio app I was running on my phone crashed as two teenage boys walked right up to N and I and got in our faces. I was a wary. "I'm from Tschetschenien (Chechnya)" one of the boys said. When I told them that I was from the UK, they proceeded to speak in awe about how "you know in London you get stabbed, just like that". When I said that we had lived in South East London they were unduly impressed. The boys willingness to come into our personal space made some sense when they told us that they were on drugs. I asked what and they said cocaine and then, as if to prove it, did a line in front of us on the picnic table. We chatted, I tried to restart the software defined radio and recorded this image (the first recording had corrupted), they offered us a cigarette. The satellite dipped below the horizon. We wished each other "Schön'n Abend", and N and I left the two boys in the darkness of the park.

2024-04-24 19:27:05

Augarten, Wien, Austria

Athens is enveloped in Saharan dust, but it remains so cold here! On Friday it is forecast to drop as low as 1C degrees. An Austrian friend told me that it has snowed nearer the Alps, harming the fruits trees, which had budded early and were already in full leaf. On an emotional level the cold and damp is making me want to curl up and stay away from more energetic tasks, such as work and exercise. I checked 'wind map' to improve understanding hoping that this would bring me comfort. The slick data visualisation shows cold air coming from the artic, passing Sasha in London, before arriving in Southern and Central Europe. Sasha are you cold?

2024-04-25 10:36:33

On my balcony, Wien, Austria

Sehr geehrte W, Ich habe im Januar dieses Jahres eine QFH-Antenne und zwei Zwischenkabel bei Ihnen bestellt. Ich fürchte, dass ich einige Probleme hatte. Ich habe ein schlechtes SNR bei Verwendung des QFH und eines der Zwischenkabel ist kaputt. Ich befürchte, dass ich möglicherweise die internen Lötverbindungen an der QFH-Antenne gebrochen habe, obwohl ich nicht glaube, dass sich die Buchsen im Kunststoffteil verdrehen. Haben Sie einen Rat? Wie kann man beispielsweise das Problem eingrenzen? Sasha Engelmann und ich nutzen Ihre Antennen schon seit vielen Jahren und hatten vorher keine Probleme. Vielen Dank für jede Hilfe. Mit freundlichen Grüßen, Sophie Dyer

2024-04-26 20:17:23

At home, Wien, Austria

2024-04-27 23:04:59

At home, Wien, Austria

2024-04-28 19:26:34

On my balcony, Wien, Austria

Sun. I sat in the sun and willed my vitamin D level to rise. I have been feeling under the weather since Friday and blame it on a lack of vitamin D. After sunset the temperature dropped quickly, then stabilised. N and I sat on the balcony without the lights off and watched the stars for a good hour. Bored from bring at home all day resting for the day, I used the broken co-ax cable, magnet wire from Shortwave Collective and some copper tape to improvise a full wave length v-dipole antenna. I can't find any documentation online of full wavelengt v-dipoles to receive NOAA POES satellites, so maybe it is not a good design. I recived a faint, noisy signal from NOAA-15. Perhaps the poor signal was because I had accidentally cut the dipole wire 30cm too short or becasue the balcony didn't allow for a true North-South orientation. Regardless, the anntena was satisfyingly sculptural.

2024-04-29 21:16:51

Diepoldplatz, Wien, Austria

2024-04-30 22:25:17

Beside the Rathaus, Wien, Austria

As I receive the satellite transmission, I listen to pop music from a large concert for the SPÖ youth organisations. To get to the street corner we walk through groups of teens. In the shadows of the park they could have passed as much older, but occasional childish impulse to jostle, shout or run after one other gave them away. I read that each year the socialist youth organisation's march through the city with torches, this year their motto is 'Vienna against the Right' or „Wien gegen Rechts“.

2024-05-01 19:47:52

My flat, Wien, Austria

It's 1 May or Workers' Day or Labour Day. It's still novel for me live in a country that celebrates the 1 May with a national holiday and street parties. I cycled into my studio and instantly felt guilty for working, as if I were a 'scab'. Vienna has a festive, carefree atmosphere. I crossed two rallies for the Sozialdemokratische Partei Österreichs (SPÖ) and for the KOMintern at Sigmund-Freud-Park. According to a crude translation of their German-langauge website, the KOMintern is a "combative, internationalist association and trade union fighting alliance of working people, councils, the unemployed and trade union political activists". The weather is sun with some cloud and wind. If I had a barometer, it would have pointed to "Change".

2024-05-02 12:07:54

On the corner of , Augarten, Wien, Austria

It remains windy today. I learned today that the expression "winds of change", which I had taken as old adage, was coined in 1969 by British Prime Minister Harold Macmillan. In a speech in Cape Town, Macmillan referred to the "wind of change […] blowing through this continent", in reference to the decolonisation of Africa. Now I know the expressions origin, I am wary of how it naturalises a social-political struggle, making it feel as inevitable as the changing of weather patterns. I am reminded of a poster I picked up in a corridor in Goldsmiths after the terrible passing of Mark Fisher. Printed in riso red, the poster reads "emancipatory politics must always destroy the appearance of a ‘natural order’, must reveal what is presented as necessary and inevitable to be a mere contingency, just as it must make what was previously deemed to be impossible seem attainable" (Fisher 2009). I see traces of the Polar Jet Stream in the clouds in the satellite image. Or rather jet streams in plural because the more I read the weather and its winds, the more my imagination of a single wind, a kind of wind super highway, breaks down. Instead I see many jet streams: curling and unravelling, breaking up and rejoining, strengthening and weakening. Sasha has shared with me an article on 'global stilling': a prediction that the climate crisis will cause global winds the weaken and possibly, eventually, still.

2024-05-03 10:38:36

Schillerplatz, Institut für Kunst und Architektur (Institute for Art and Architecture), Akademie der bildenden Künste Wien, Austria

This image was received during a workshop with third year architecture students at the Akademie der bildenden Künste. It is raining heavily, however we got lucky with the weather and satellite orbits. During a dry moment between down pours and drizzle, we stood in Schillerplatz and pointed the turnstile antenna toward NOAA-19. For some reason the signal to noise ratio was poor. I will try to understand why, perhaps the dongle I was using has seen one too many workshops. We tried later in the day with v-dipoles and the students got clear images, so, it must have been my set-up. A noisy image can be intersting in a workshop. Overall we had a good day. During the WebSDR exercise the students heard lots of radio amateur chatter, including two men with heavy British accents talking about one of the men's father passing away. Another students heard a man in Germany describing how the Rhine River had flooded his cellar. All in all, it was a very radio active workshop.

2024-05-04 21:54:40

On the balcony, Wien, Austria

I think I saw NOAA-19! I was looking at the sky at exactly where I imagined NOAA-19 to be, 50 degrees above the horiszon to my West, and there was a faint white dot moving steady across the sky. It's a clear night but there visibility isn't exceptional and the stairwell lights of the neighbouring building kept turning on making it harder to see the stars. Yet, the position and velocity matched those of NOAA-19. I could only track the faint point of light for a few seconds before loosing it. Sasha and I have speculated about what it would be like to 'return the gaze'. I felt that I was locking eyes with an old but elusive friend. I need to think more about this moment and what it means to watch a satellite, watching earth. Watching you, watching me. I was so concentrated that I forgot to take any documentary photo. So, I've uploaded a photo from earlier in the day of me shoving free compost from the city's recycling centre.

2024-05-05 19:47:02

Reclaimed community garden, Hernals, Wien, Austria

First day of summer, first mosquito bite of the 2024, my first ever swim in the Alte Donau (Old Danube). The forecast on my phone predicted rain at 3pm, but the clouds passed us and Veronika, her dog and I enjoyed several hours at the Alte Donau. We made the most of the cooling clear waters before they turn murky with summer algae and river weed. I didn't realise until I got home, how much my face had 'caught the sun'. I received an broken-up transmission from NOAA-15 in a long abandoned building lot, recently commandeered as an unofficial community garden. On the way home, I could see a towering anvil cloud to the South. Tomorrow should be sunny, despite multiple storms in the region.

2024-05-06 19:19:44

On the corner of Diepold Park, Wien, Austria

Bright sunlight, thunder booms and rain drops the size of marbles. Israel has ordered civilians to leave Rafah, but to where? In Vienna, European Election posters line the larger streets: Patriotisch, Zusammen in Europa, … I will try to collect the slogans.

2024-05-10 12:09:30

Just off Obere Augartenstraß, Wien, Austria

Woke up to Netanyahu's face on the front page of the Guardian. Felt grim despair. Got up, messaged my sister, made a medical appointment, and went to the studio. I received this image on my way in. Veronika, my studio mate, had made spare lunch so we ate together with her collaborator, T. Being cooked food quiets the soul. My hormones at still languishing somewhere at the bottom of the mid Atlantic trench. I feel dreadful. It's a beautifully sunny, clear day.

2024-05-12 23:13:34

My flat, Wien, Austria

My hormones have been so low, I have felt dislocated from my body. Come this evening I finally felt a little better. Last night, I was up until 2am watching the Northern Lights or Polarlitchter from a north-facing window in our flat. I was incredibly lucky as I hadn't seen the space weather forecast, but a friend messaged, "Don’t forget there might be polar lights tonight!". At first, I thought that she had misunderstood – we're too far South. Google affirmed my skepticism. Still, it was a clear night so I looked outside. At first, I could see nothing. After around five minutes a bright pink glow appeared behind the rooftops. I completely freaked out. N and I dropped our plans to sleep and ran to a local sports ground. We were both in a state of shock and awe. In my elation called Sasha, texted my family in the UK "Look North!", patronised N for using a flash, and garbled "Danke" to a groundsman who was explaining that we needed to leave as he was locking up. We headed to a local park but the lights had dimmed to a level were I wasn't sure if I could still see them or the pink glow had burned itself into my imagination. Back at home they flared again, this time visible from the flat. N went to bed but I stayed up watching. The pink became almost as vivid as in the long exposure photos I had been taking. White shafts of light appeared and disappeared, so did a fainter green glow. My skin tingles just thinking about it.

2024-05-13 23:01:31

Balcony, Wien, Austria

Sun, clouds, and a cool wind. Today is a day of body euphoria. This has become a monthly ritual and one I should get better at celebrating. I am back inside my body and its a wonderous feeling: I have energy and I feel (almost) clear headed. After a long day of work calls, I made it out of the house around 7:45 pm to buy food from the local supermarket before close. On my way home, the sun was low, hidden, except for explosions of gold at the end of every side street. I walked slowly and took in the soothing quality of the light.

2024-05-14 22:49:02

On my balcony, Wien, Austria

I saw NOAA-18. I tuned off the lights and then, like magic, mid-pass, a white dot appeared almost directly overhead. I could keep eyes on it for several minutes. The satellite glided across the sky, so much faster than I had imagine. It makes sense, that the satellite appears to accelerate when directly overhead and then slow down as it approaches the horizon. Despite this logic, I had always imagined it moving at a constant speed, like the hand of a clock. I am twitching with excitement.

2024-05-15 21:23:30

On the balcony, Wien, Austria

Apparenly poets and shopping centre security guards can be assassins too. The media are reporting that there has been an assasination attempt on the incoming Prime Minister of Slovakia. The location is a few hundred kilometres from Vienna. News feeds identify the assassin not by name but by his profession: shopping centre security guard and poet. Poignantly, NOAA-19 passed between Vienna and Bratislava. I am certain that saw the satellite. I had set an alarm on my phone for the satellite pass but when it rang I had just drained a pan of boiled asparagus, so I gave into to hunger and ate dinner. After finishing, I ran outside to catch the second half of the pass. I used the new cable Sasha has sent me. It is a clear night and a gentle temperature. Earlier, I swam in the Danube. It was windy and spray forced my eyes shut. I had the water to myself, save for a swan and passing cyclists and whatever or whoever was lurking below. I dived in a couple of times before almost slipping on the plastic pontoon. Swimming is perhaps the most effective way I deal with pain. I hope today is the last day of my period-related pains and restless nights. My body is aching to begin the slow process of unknotting itself.

2024-05-16 12:32:00

Augarten, Wien, Austria

It didn't record, which was such a shame as the satellite pass was long and a sweet 60 degrees to my West. The weather is here warm, gusty and cloudy. The weather app on my phone says that it'll be cloudy for the next two weeks – I hope not. After reading a news story on how people with freckles are at high risk of skin damage, I purchased a pocket-sized tube of sun cream. I am ready for the sun and now its gone. The Slovakian Prime Minister has survived the attack on his life. The latest reports suggest the gunman is in his 70s. It is likely that he grew up in the Soviet era Czechoslovakia and lived through the 'Gentle Revolution', possibly even the 1968 Prague Spring.

2024-05-17 12:22:00

Augarten by the flowers, Wien, Austria

Dust, grey skies, low light. I am reading over lunch an article on Microsoft's Planetary Computer, shared with me by Sasha. I began reading it during my last hospital appointment, which felt appropriate as, in my experience, hospitals are sites dislocation, dissociation and disorientation (as well as the putting back together of bodies). The authors are arguing for "pluralising the planetary" and recognising its "radical incompleteness"; they are favouring "messy operation(s)" over smooth form (Richardson and Munster, 2023). I message Sasha extracts, so as to not forget them and share resonances. The first reads "a computational enclosure reimagined as liberation".

2024-05-19 22:10:44

On the window sill, Hernals, Vienna, Austria

I willed myself to stay awake to capture the transmission, even if I knew that it would likely be more noise than image because of the low elevation of the satellite. I missed yesterday. Another absence in the archive due to another night's sleep lost to discomfort. The weather was better than expected today, so I dragged my body out of the house into the city and into contact with other bodies. I went to a beautifully queer refugee football tournament with M, where we sat in the sun and sweated; a solo swim in the cooling waters of Kongreßbad; to the Kino de France where I sat in the airless dark and watched GUAPO’Y by Peruvian director Sofía Paoli Thorne, my body tensing at the noise of a young guy in the row in front, munching popcorn; and lastly to the warmth of friend's flat for a takeaway curry with her adorable two-year-old. I am particularly excited about my first swim at Kongreßbad. It's incredible outdoor pool complex opened in 1928 during the 'Red Vienna' years, when the Social Democratic Workers' Party of Austria (SDAP) governed the city. Despite my sleeplessness, it has been a full day. I meditate on this and give my thanks as I receive NOAA-19.

2024-05-20 11:44:50

Diepoldpark, by the picnic benches, Vienna, Austria

Happy launch-day satellite NOAA-18! It's been 19 years since on this day in 2005 you were launched from Vandenberg Space Force Base in California. Your planned mission was only two years, yet you are still transmitting. Back on Earth, I have cast aside my mum's landline telephone, for a Motorola mobile, for a my first smart phone (a friend's hand-me-down), for an iPhone 13. Can you imagine? It's a pocket-sized radio transceiver that has more computing power than Apollo 11. Dear NOAA-18, radio technology has not only transformed how we make phone calls, it has become cheap and easy to combine with code. While you have been in orbit, software defined radio has become a truly low cost alternative to conventional radio – it is what makes this project, open-weather, possible. Perhaps you already know this since last year, the American government outsourced the management of your data to the longtime defence contractor, Parsons Corporation. Parsons enrolled you in trial cloud-based ground system that is running off Microsoft Azure. As I mentioned in a previous Weather Note, Microsoft has announced that it is building a 'Planetary Computer'. Given your involvement in the trial, it is probable that in your "extended life" you are helping to build this 'digital double' of Earth. Next year, in September, the contract awarded to Parsons to maintain you expires. September 2025 could be date of your mission, but we don't that as information is hard to find. (Parsons, 2022; NOAA, 2023; NCEI, 2023). If true, you have one more birthday to celebrate. Until next year NOAA-18!

2024-05-21 13:12:14

Augarten, Vienna, Austria

Its humid, muggy, close or "schwül" as my German speking studio mate, DD, said before we tried to find a good translation. Weather words rarely seem to translate one-to-one. Or, perhaps this is true for all words, and the high situated, experiential nature of weather exposes the limits of translation. Perhaps then we should get better at learning each other words for weather? Extend our fluency in talking about the 'ever starnger weather' and decoding memories of past weather. Or, maybe we should not rely too heavily on words to communicate weather? After all, its so bodily. Here, it is getting 'muggier'. I am going home as I feel a heaache coming on.

2024-05-22 09:25:54

At home, Hernals, Wien, Austria

The air is fresh. Broken sun and wind. I left the bedroom window open during the night and half-asleep-half-awake dreamt of a fierce wind, rain lashing the window, and flying debris. I have been thinking and writing about 'fire weather'. This morning, staring my left eye that had swollen shut in the night, for not apparent reason, I wondered if inflammation is a an internal, bodily fire weather.

2024-05-23 21:21:17

Friedhof Hernals (Hernals Cemetery), Wien, Austria

Again, my phone's weather app says that it will rain, but the day turns out fine. I doubt the algorithm's ability to account for the dramatic effect of the Alps on Vienna's weather. There can be huge thunderstorms only a couple hundred kilometres South, and Vienna will be basking in sunshine. My day, too, defies my expectations. I woke early, rough, the swelling in eye gone down but the pain in my side throbbing. Yet work was good and afterwards I cycle to an outdoor pool, then indulged in sushi at a neighbourhood restaurant with N. I received this image from a hilltop cemetery. In the silence afterwards, stood on a path between the flickering of red lamps of graves, I feel time thicken. I am reminded of how Libyan author Hisham Matar, when stood at a cemetery's edge, asks "What is it to remember the dead?" For Matar, "the scale is unfathomable". It is "[d]eath’s endless appetite", he writes. "The deceased outnumber the living by such a scale that the present suddenly seemed to me to be the golden rim of a cloth". (Matar 2019)

2024-05-27 20:45:48

Leaning out of the window, Wien, Austria

My image contains interference from lightening strikes. I have likely seen lightening interference before, but it a first for me to be able to confirm it. The sky above our house was blue but to the East I could see dark storm clouds. Each time the clouds flashed orange, even though they they were too far for thunder to be audible, I could 'hear' the strikes as bursts of radio noise. I have uploaded a photo of the waterfall display clearly showing a horizontal line of interference from a lightening strike. In the decoded imagery, the lightening is visible as broken lines, not more than a one to two pixels wide. Given the position of NOAA-19, the storm must have been between me and the it. I should note that that last photo of the storm clouds almost overhead was taken more than 10 minutes after I had finished recording and packed away my antenna. Under no circumstances is it wise to point an antenna in the proximity of a storm. I admit that the speed of the storm clouds surprised me. As they approached, a warm wind got up and shook trees on the street below, while I watched neighbours rush to closed windows on flapping curtains. The change in light levels was dramatic too. In less than half an hour, day turned to night.

2024-05-27 20:32:49

Sitting on the window ledge, Wien, Austria

Humid, blue, warm skies. Tired, achy, loose body. Humid and tried, blue and achy, warm and loose. There is lightening interference from a storm to my West. I read the news, not making it more than a few paragraphs. "The Israeli missiles struck tents in an area to the west of Rafah city that was supposed to be safe from attack". "[A]t least eight missiles struck the camp – a designated safe zone – on Sunday night at about 8.45pm local time (17:45 GMT). "Witnesses described charred bodies and flames. A doctor said the majority of the victims he saw were women and children". (The New York Times, 27 May 2024) “'We pulled out people who were in an unbearable state,' Mohammed Abuassa told the Associated Press. 'We pulled out children who were in pieces. We pulled out young and elderly people. The fire in the camp was unreal.'” (Associated Press via The Guardian 27 May 2024) Judith Butler asks, “Whose lives are regarded as lives worth saving and defending, and whose are not?” They continue: “One way of posing the question of who “we” are in these times of war is by asking whose lives are considered valuable, whose lives are mourned, and whose lives are considered ungrievable… We can see the division of the globe into grievable and ungrievable lives from the perspective of those who wage war in order to defend the lives of certain communities, and to defend them against the lives of others—even if it means taking those latter lives.” (Butler, 2009)

2024-06-01 21:11:06

Sitting on the window ledge, Wien, Austria

Today hasn’t been easy. The weather is sodden and my mood is low. I almost miss the satellite pass and make a last minute decision to try and receive the transmission from the flat. Sat on the window ledge, precariously positioned over the wet street three stories below, I receive an imperfect image. I am glad.

2024-05-29 11:35:05

Augarten, Wien, Austria

It is sunny. A few white and grey clouds move across an otherwise deep blue sky. A cool wind raises the hairs on my arms. As I receive the radio transmission, I imagine NOAA-18’s rapidly changing location. “Are you over Latvia or Lithuania? Perhaps now Belarus?” I ask. “What do you see?” The questions are not rhetorical nor do I expect a reply. I list the countries its invisible trajectory crosses: Ukraine, Romania, Bulgaria. The satellite’s signal begins to stretch, its wavelength subtly lengthening as it moves away from me. “Have you crossed into Greece?” I ask. “Are you over the blackness of the Mediterranean Sea?” My line-of-sight with the NOAA-18 is unbroken as looks down on Cairo and Egypt, then, it its East, Gaza and Israel. Here, I loose its signal and my line-of-sight. Later, I look up the poetry of Mahmoud Darwish, and re-read ‘Poetic Regulations’ “The stars had only one task: they taught me how to read. They taught me I had a language in heaven and another language on earth. Who am I? Who am I? I don’t want to answer yet. May a star fall into itself, and may a forest of chestnut trees rise in the night toward the Milky Way with me, and may it say: Remain here!”

2024-06-03 20:48:20

At home, Wien, Austria

I have skipped two days of weather notes. It’s Monday. Thunder rolls as Sasha and I frequency shift from one open-weather Zoom call after another. First we heard from L and D in Scotland about how the satellite image decoder is up and running, and the redesign of the Public Archive is almost complete! We then spoke to G in Berlin who shared with us the code that he is writing for the automatic satellite ground stations. Together we started to speculate about how the 3D printed casing of the satellite ground stations could be. We imagine the ground station box resting on a bedroom bookshelf or mounted the wall of an art gallery. We tingled with excitement, encouraging each other in the game of visualising the work complete. In between, Sasha and I spoke with J, a curator in Barcelona who is planning an exhibition on the themes of navigation and orientation … let's see. I took some Ibuprofen to avert a migraine and then couldn't stop sneezing. Sasha giggle when, I turned of my camera instead of muting and loudly blew my running nose. As my work day ended, the thunder storm moved overhead. On a call with just Sasha , we draw on our remaining brain power and belief, I shared my proposal for a sounded-based transmission for the Year of Weather project. Inspired by the desire to 'meet people where they are' and by how past feminist alliances such as F.I.R.E. in Costa Rica and Pirate Radio Women in Ireland used radio to share with their community counter narratives and information, the transmission would share our weather notes intermingled with the realtime local weather updates of a meteorology service. A second important reference is the "VOLMET" radio broadcasts that are rolling weather forecasts for aircraft, read out often by highly gendered and increasingly automated female voices. Before hanging up, Sasha and I began to test the proposal and to think through different scenarios. I had planned to squeeze in a hours more work but my brother called and we spoke almost two hours. It rare that we speak for so long on the phone, so the call was special. Lightening seemed to knock of the signal so I move around the flat, searching for a more stable signal, plugging in my phone to different wall sockets.

2024-06-04 23:33:06

On the balcony, Wien, Austria

On WhatsApp, I write to my brother: "It rained so heavily in the night our flat was saturated by the sound. I half expected to wake to flooded streets".

2024-06-05 11:49:10

Pedestrian crossing, by work, Austria

It’s noon and the weather is hot and steamy. My head is fuzzy from drinking pink Prosecco with M for her 40th birthday. My antenna is clutching a roadside pole next to the pedestrian crossing outside our studio. An older woman crosses the road, stooped and slow. She must have felt my gaze on her back, as she turns her face folded into a warm smile. I smile back. Trades people and children pass, openly curious but mostly unsmiling. I note how an electric scooter and hybrid bus cause bands of radio frequency interference.

2024-06-07 10:10:13

In the moist air of the park, Wien, Austria

I miss the beginning of the satellite pass, but enjoy sitting in the humid, sun. It’s deceptively warm. The image crop is awkward but perfectly frames the Mediterranean Basin and Black Sea. In the ‘visible channel’ there are few clouds, however the infrared channel reveals of wispy veil of cloud over most of the continent. North Africa is cloudless.

2024-06-06 20:50:00

Issey Sushi & Co, Wien, Austria

My sister, R, and her partner, B, are visiting from Cornwall. They have come to see me and N, with the hope of drying out after the wettest spring on record in the UK. They both work on the land so are very exposed to the recent extreme weather. R has decides to me how the land, after being so waterlogged has now dried smooth and cracked making planing difficult. Plus, the warm wet weather has caused the local slug populations to explode. I’ve been having nightmares of the weather being so terrible when they visit that R decides to emigrate with B to Australia. At least the first part of the nightmare comes true. R, B and me are trapped in a restaurant shop as the heavens open and day turns to night. Only an hour earlier we’d been swimming in an outdoor pool. Now the road is a torrent of grey water. A standing wave forms where the pavement used to begin. Everyone in the restaurant is watching the storm, impressed by its power. The lightening strikes close, the thunder cracking overheard with almost no delay. The limbs of trees flail, adding to the drama. R says that the sorting of sushi boxes into the square bags of delivery drivers looks like a three dimensional game of Tetris. At some point the delivery drivers must have headed into the storm as when I look up from trying to photograph the rain, they’re gone. When the rain lessens we pay up and leave. The rain has stopped but the lightening continues to flash until after midnight. I give up the idea of sticking an antenna out of the window and decode to upload this weather note instead.

2024-06-20 12:00:35

Augarten, Wien, Austria

It's a balmy temperature, just warmer than my body. The sky is hazy and there is a cool breeze. The weather is mild, but I feel enraged. At breakfast, I let rage well up inside of me as I read the New York Times newsletter's coverage of crisis of aid not reaching people inside Gaza. In my lay opinion, the article's conclusion is morally and legally bankrupt. I have worked on armed conflicts for the last seven years and yesterday, in preparation for a consultancy job, I read 'SOUTH AFRICA’S COMMENTS ON THE REPLY BY ISRAEL TO THE QUESTION POSED BY JUDGE NOLTE AT THE END OF THE ORAL HEARINGS HELD ON 17 AND 18 MAY 2024'. In short, denying civilians access to medical services and humanitarian aid is punitive and illegal. End of. I suspect different colours of my rage are interconnected, like clouds of a cyclonic weather system. For example, I have such bad cycling rage at the moment and it’s very misandrist. Everything time a male cyclist overtakes me at the traffic lights and then proceeds to cycle slower then me – a regular occurrence – I mentally flip-out and practice the cycling equivalent of tailgating. I should stop this and find a better outlet for this negative energy. Recently, I chased down a male cyclist who had, unprovoked, shouted at me. Sadly, he didn’t notice and it was me who turned into a one way street in the wrong direction. I could continue to list the things that have provoked rage in me, but there is little point as they are proxies for greater, less direct injustices.

1 2 3 4 next